Modern Day Pirates

AYE ME LADS AND LASSES! YE MAY BE AWONDERIN' WHAT ALL THIS PIRATE STUFF IS ABOUT AND YOU SEE, WE ARE MODERN DAY PIRATES, WE ARE. 'TIS TRUE, BY ME OATH.

BUT, YE 'AVE NAUGHT TO FEAR FROM US! ME AND ME CREW, WE DON'T GO A CARRIN' SWORDS OR PISTOLS, NOR DO WE ARM OUR SHIPS WITH CANNONS. THAT WAS THE WAY IN THE GOLDEN AGE OF PIRACY BACK IN THE LATE 1600'S TO EARLY 1700'S. BACK THEN, THE LIKES OF EDWARD TEACH (YOU MAY KNOW 'IM AS BLACK BEARD), CALICO JACK RACKHAM, CAPTIAN MORGAN (WHO FIRST STARTED A PUTTIN' SPICE IN 'IS RUM, BLESS 'IM) AND ANNE BONNIE HAUNTED THE SEAS OF THE CARIBBEAN ISLANDS, A TAKIN' WHAT THEY WANTED, ANYWAY THEY COULD! HAVIN' SPENT SO MUCH TIME IN THOSE ISLANDS,

I LEARNT RIGHT QUICK THAT THERE WERE STILL PIRATES DOWN THERE AND IT WAS A LOT EASIER TO JOIN 'EM THAN TO BE AGIN 'EM! BUT, WE ARE MODERN DAY PIRATES. INSTEAD OF GUNS AND CUTLASSES WE USE SAIL BOATS, SCUBA GEAR, AND GUITARS TO "ENTERTAIN" THE PEOPLE WHO "FALL INTO OUR CLUTCHES" AND THEY GIVE US SOME OF THEIR TREASURE! INSTEAD OF A LOOTIN' AND A STEALIN' WE CALLS IT "GRATUITIES"!

NOW, DON'T THAT HAVE A BETTER RING TO IT, NOW? SO, DON'T BE AFERD OF OUR JOLLY ROGER OR OUR PIRATICAL WAYS, JUST REMEMBER TO HAVE A GOOD TIME AND WE'LL ALL GET ON JUST FINE! AAAARRRRGGGGG!